Wednesday, 9 September 2009
Success And Happiness--Another question
My senior in school asked (I dont know who by name) : "I think in present competitive world people are comparing with others and spoiling there happiness, I mean if you start comparing your success with someone who is in better position than you, you cant enjoy the happiness of success.what do you say about this?"
(Again answers to questions of this type are just perceptions, there can be more than one answers)
I would not be wrong if I say that everything in the world is relative.
You dont call yourself successful just because you are earning good, a few people know you, or you never had any major problems in your life. You say that you are successful when you earn a better amount when compared to a few others you know or a majority in general, or you are more healthier than average in the society. I will not go into discussion in defining success, will generally take it as money+fame+health+"happiness".
If one doesnot compare with anybody else, he compares it with himself. "Five Years back, I was just a clerk in the office and now I am a manager; this is my success." Meaning Success is always a relative term.
Coming to happiness, someone has rightly defined happiness as "Wanting what you actually got" implying that after you get a 'thing' you realise that this was what you had wanted in the first place.
So my conclusion:
Success depends on 'others' (could be an average, something which no one had discovered/invented/achieved before, or simply oneself in some other time frame).
A good part of Happiness depends on success.
Coming to the question:
As success is relative, one cannot completely avoid comparing it with others success.
If others are more successful than you then it simply implies that you are not successful. ( There is never an Ultimate Success)
Which inturn implies you will not be happy.
The Key to happiness here lies in something called as "Complacency".
If you are satisfied with what you have then, even if you compare with somebody else, you will not feel that you have less or as a matter of fact more. A sense of fulfillment enters your mind and you can enjoy life to the fullest. But again even this should have a limit, because if you are complacent with anything you have or do, you will lack enthusiasm in achieving bigger and better results. I think the push and pull created by Complacency and Strive born out of comparing success nullify at some place, different positions for different people, and thus happiness and success varies among people. Thus some people are happy even if they have less and some people are 'not so happy' even if they have more.
So, finally, the answer to the question, according to me, is "Most of the times, Yes".
I hope this is not confusing... :) :)